Mindless Monday

As the world goes crazy around you, focus on today and what God has blessed you with. Each day shine your light and take a step forth in faith … God has your future. You just have to trust and obey…

I think I might be a Jesuit

Good thoughts by a good friend …

The Juris Doctor is "in"

Someone told me in order to have a “successful” blog you have to write every few days, on a regular basis, otherwise people won’t read it.  That’s probably good advice but I have found I only write when I have something to say–and that’s not every few days.  So forgive me for being silent from time to time, but my inclination is to remain silent if there is nothing of significance to say.

This approach reminds me of a story about Albert Einstein:

Albert Einstein was invited to speak at a banquet held in his honor at Swarthmore College. Hundreds of people from all over the country crowded an auditorium to hear what he had to say. When it came time for him to speak, the greatest physicist walked to the lectern, solemnly looked around, and said, “Ladies and gentlemen, I am very sorry, but I have nothing to say.”…

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Walk in Someone Else’s Shoes

Imagine you’ve got an opportunity to try something new, but are nervous about it.  Imagine you’ve got someone, a co-worker, who said they’ve accompany you or help mentor you, to bring you along.  And you’re counting on this person (lets call her Jane) to help you so you don’t have to do it alone.

Now imagine you’ve set a time/date to meet with Jane to go over the particulars, so you could get the lay of the land to help yourself visualize what it is you’ve got to get done — only to realize Jane has forgotten about you and will not be making your meeting.  Now you have to move forward with no direction and have no idea how to do it alone.

What’s your first reaction?  Anger? Disbelief at their lack of reliability?  Or … do you stop and remind yourself that the world is not all about YOU … and this person may have had unusual circumstances that gave them cause to forget or no show?

Now imagine that you’re out grocery shopping, and you see Jane shuffling down the aisle with a sick and aging person next to her side. She’s walking as slow as she can to help what looks to be a loved one down the aisle in one of those motorized carts.  Although you’re still upset with her for leaving you holding the weight of this ‘new project’ and leaving you feeling like you’ve been stranded with it, you know you can’t ignore her.  After all she’s seen you and smiled from across the freezer section.  You lift your arm in greeting, and make your way there.  After all … it’s where you were heading anyway – as you promised you’d pick up a pound of shrimp for your family.

“Hi,”  you offer and say nothing more.  You’re still judging her in your mind for not giving you the support you needed.

“Hi.  How’s the project going?” She sadly smiles.

Here’s where hopefully it dawns on you that she has a lot on her plate, and you can see the bigger picture with Jane and not judge her for the small window or piece of your experience about her that you’ve only seen from work.

“I could use some help.”  You say wondering if you have the right.

“I’m sorry.  I’d fully intended to help you along, but my mother’s health took a turn for the worse.  My father died last year, and she took a fall last week … about the same time you and I were supposed to meet.”

“Why didn’t you tell me?”

“Well, I’ve been distracted to say the least.  And I’ve got a lot on my plate … I didn’t want anyone at work to think anything less of my or jump to the conclusion that I couldn’t get it all done .. which is why I delegated that project to you.  I knew I couldn’t take care of her and work that project at the same time.”

________

I’m sure you can imagine the rest of the conversation … Jane is balancing trying to be everything to everyone and something just  had to give.  Unfortunately for you, her exit was bad timing for you and your new responsibilities.  So what’s the bottom line here?

Too many times in life, we put people in categories or stereotype them as flaky or unreliable, when maybe they’re just coping the best they can with the circumstances they’ve been given.  Instead of judging someone or being angry with how they respond (especially if its in a manner which you would ‘never’ respond) – try to look at life through their perspective.  Try give the credit for the unknowns in life.  Maybe their life is full of complications – and your one project or task isn’t the big picture.

This post is about letting our assumptions go of other people.  This post is about thinking better of people.  Instead of jumping to anger – try jumping to empathy.  Put yourself in someone else’s shoes today.  Going forward when someone upsets you – think of what’s going on in their life instead of jumping to anger and judgment. This is something we all could benefit from, myself included. I think the world would be a lot better place if we all changed our filter and took the focus off of ‘our ego’ and centered it on ‘what Christ wants us to see’.

Try it … and let me know what happens.

Humbling Words

Wow.  I woke up Sunday to a few Facebook posts on my wall saying, ‘Congratulations’ & ‘Great review!’.  I had no idea what they were talking about, so I looked online at our local newspaper, where I found a humbling review for Coming Home.

I thought I’d post it here too … for you to read.

“Coming Home” by Kimberly McKay (CreateSpace, 340 pages, available at Amazon.com)

I liked getting to know the spunky but broken Anne LaSal in Oklahoma author Kimberly McKay’s “Finding Kylie” and “Facing Redemption,” so it was a treat to get more of her story in “Coming Home.”

Anne is the best friend of main character Chastity in the two earlier books written by this budding writer.

McKay, who at one time worked for The Oklahoman, does a great job of setting up the suspense — will it be romance or sparks? — when Anne agrees to be on the popular “Broadcast Affair” network show without learning who the show’s bachelor is for the season.

In “Facing Redemption,” readers learn that Anne is coming fresh off a nasty breakup and breaking free from a sad past when she agrees to be on the show. Realizing she has nothing to lose, she’s maybe even ready for a bit of fun and adventure. She finds that and so much more on this journey of self-discovery.

Anne’s growing up as a military brat helps prepare her for the drama of being on a dating reality television show along the lines of “The Bachelor,” where numerous girls compete for the affection of one man. The dilemma she faces is whether to believe Chad Chambers is truly a nice guy she could actually fall for or just a really skilled actor.

Readers might be tempted to settle into “Coming Home” as a typical romance novel, but McKay throws in enough curves to keep the reader furiously turning pages to reach the finale.

Mckay does a good job of making her characters real and relatable. They know loss. They have to rely on their faith. They want to love, but they’re full of all of the emotions anyone is subject to when opening up to this most vulnerable of feelings — fear, insecurity, uncertainty and hope.

“Coming Home” is a fast read with main characters that pique the reader’s interest and draw compassion. Side characters add just the right amount of trouble.

McKay uses a deft hand in weaving elements of faith into the story. The characters face a realistic struggle between romantic interest and purity, but there’s no unabashed evangelism. Anne’s talk with her new friend Kamryn gives readers a great analogy of the difference between a true relationship with God and empty religion.

— Tricia Pemberton,

for The Oklahoman

Thank you Miss Pemberton.  You humbled me and blew me away.  For those who wish to read this book, you can get the kindle version, here, or the paperback, here.